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Bringing up Children - Christian Parenting Parenting and the Bible 1. Ephesians 6:1-41.Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother,” which is the first commandment with promise: “that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.” .( Exodus 20.12.) And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord. Parents, do not anger your children, but rear them in the discipline and in the teaching of Our Lord. 2. Colossians 3:21 Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged. 3. Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. 4. Deuteronomy 6:5-9 Love the Lord your God ....... 5. Deuteronomy 4:9-10 “But watch out! Be careful never to forget...... 6. Matthew 19:13-15 One day some parents brought their children to Jesus...... 7. Deuteronomy 11:19 Teach them to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. 8. Proverbs 23:13-14 Do not hesitate to discipline a child. If you spank him, he will not die. Spank him yourself, and you will save his soul from hell. 9. Proverbs 22:15 A child’s heart has a tendency to do wrong, but the rod of discipline removes it far away from him. 10. Proverbs 29:15 The rod and rebuke bestow wisdom, but an undisciplined child brings shame to his mother. 11. Proverbs 29:17 Discipline your child, and he will give you rest; he will bring you happiness. 12. Hebrews 12:6-11. ....for what son is there whom a father does not chasten?... Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. .... For they indeed for a few days chastened us as seemed best to them, but He for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness. Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. III. Needs of Parents a) Parenting needs wisdom: God promised us wisdom, if we ask Him. We need to give our children. 1. life 2. love 3. laughter. Follow rules like: Be fair, be firm, be fun. b) Parenting requires prayer: Persistent prayer and God centered prayer. c) Parenting demands demonstration: Children learn more from what we do. Demonstrate the fruit of the Spirit. Listen to your children. Homes are built on understanding. Give your children grace and accept them even when they fail. Admit to them when you do anything wrong. Keep your promises. Give affection ( touch, hug, kiss) and affirmation (praise, appreciate, good, great ), attention ( listen with your eyes, listen with your ears ). d) Parenting needs priority setting: Taking time to teach the Word of God, family prayer time, regularly going to church, etc. Giving them a fixed time if possible. IV. Parenting makes us a) Providers - Provide their needs, but do not over provide. Over provision and over protection hinder the Child's growth. b) Mentors (teaching & training) -Teach them and guide them c) Stewards - Our children belong first to God and secondly belong to parents. God loves them countless times more than we love them. So just worrying about them and being anxious about them will not produce any good thing. They belong to God more than they belong to us. d) Models - Till around 14, children do what you tell them to do, but after that they do what parents showed them to do. V. Parenting at different stages. a) Birth to 3 years - need touch, utmost care and attention. They need to laugh a lot but should know that there are some things which are not acceptable. b) 3 to 15 years - They learn from parents, teachers and friends. So parents must be wise in knowing what is going on in their lives and the problems they are facing and make special efforts in counselling them and moulding them. This is the time where parents should spend more time teaching the Word of God and about God's greatness. c) 13 to 24 years - This is the age where they become more individualistic and self dependent and they start feeling that we are intruding into their lives and most of the times they tend to think that we are not with them. This is the stage where parents need to become their friends, by playing with them, by enjoying what they enjoy and so on. More than criticism, they need emotional support and encouragement. d) 22 to 30 years - By this stage of life, children are grown into adults and will be more concerned with Job and marriage and parents must be willing to release them from their authority and allow them to build their life and families. Stick on to Godly principles in their marriages. Continue to pray for them and the generation to come through them. VI. Problems in Parenting. a) Parents' upbringing and values. b) Parents' ignorance and priorities. c) Parents' relating to one another, and others. d) Time and money management. e) Family prayer time and eating together. VII. Discussion Points 1. Relationship with grandparents 2. Impact of parenting on generations. 3. Showing partiality among children 4. Different ways of having fun with children 5. Punishing children in frustration & limits of punishment. I humbly accept that this paper is a small drop in the ocean, but we have a great God, who will surely help us and give us grace in bringing up our children as we depend on Him. Dr. B. Kezia Rani & Dr.P. John Paul |